Adopted from an interview performed by Huffpost with specialists
Unfortunately, when some parents find out their child is being bullied, they might mishandle the situation although it is out of good intentions.
Normally, you would love to raise your kids to be tough and self-reliant, however, you should carefully select your words and expressions when having conversations about bullying with your child in order to avoid worsening things even more.
Do you know that bullying today is so pervasive that 1 in every 5 students have reported being bullied inside schools, according to the National Center for Educational Statistics? It’s been proved that bullying directly results in mental health problems such as depression, anxiety and lower self-esteem. Not only this, but it also causes physical health issues like stomachaches, headaches, and disorder in sleep and eating patterns. Bullied students may likewise have trouble academically such as lower grades and test scores, and they are more prone to skipping school.
HuffPost asked experts to reveal the worst things parents can say to a child who’s being bullied as well as the things to say instead. Read through the pages of this article to find out:
“You’re just being dramatic.”
This remark is specifically addressed to young girls more than boys. You should be grateful if your child opens up to you about bullying because they rarely do. If you get this chance, don’t blow it, you should rather seize it and never tell them they are exaggerating about it, otherwise, they would never come to you again to discuss any of their issues.
“I find that many girls don’t come forward for help because they worry they’ll be viewed as weak and incapable of handling social issues, or labeled as problematic and dramatic,” Hurley said. “This cuts right into the self-esteem of kids dealing with very anxiety-producing social situations.”
“Just ignore it.”
“This is advice that’s been around for generations, so parents likely heard at some point during their youth,” Katie Hurley, a licensed clinical social worker and author of “No More Mean Girls: The Secret to Raising Strong, Confident, and Compassionate Girls”, told HuffPost. “When parents say this, kids feel both dismissed and isolated. It’s exceptionally difficult to ignore a bully, and telling kids to do so only causes kids to feel even more alone in the world.”
Yes, it’s OK to encourage your child to figure out ways to reduce contact with the bully and just ignore them, still this is not a long-term fix to the situation, said parenting expert Barbara Coloroso.
“To avoid is hard; to ignore is almost impossible,” Coloroso, author of “The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander,” said. “In attempting to ignore the relentless taunting and attacks, your child is likely to begin to internalize the messages of those who are targeting them, ‘I am dumb, I am stupid, I’m no good.’”
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